[you doorknob]

Ah geez, today is really really a silly day.

To put it bluntly, or relating it to one of my previous posts, I've de-synchronized from myself again. Ahaha, and I don't exactly, really really know why. It's really, really weird.

Today is so different from my everyday, especially since I've succumbed to my inner desires and devils. It's like.

Asmo-nee tempted me way, way too many times today. Beelze-nee made me eat a lo~t necessarily, and of course, succeeded. Luci-nee made me feel arrogant and the whole elite thing again. And it seemed to me that others were mocking me so I let Sata-nee take control of me. Belphe-nee too, as usual. Though maybe, a bit too intense today, aha. Mammon, yeah, maybe it was her why I was so craving for something so much. Or is it Levi-nee? Probably, both. [If you have no idea what I'm saying, see last post and search "seven stakes of purgatory" :>]

...I've did and said mean stuffs to emmy at plurk.
...I wasn't able to continue with my day as I usually do, especially with my daily training and so.
...Heck, my ddr is so flawed, I can't even dance a single song I've previously marked as 'confident enough' to do it.
...I ate a lot and a lot, even the evil sodas AND ice cream on top of it!
...I kept on being lazy. Or maybe, I was really forcing myself already?

Tra~ la~ la~ The list goes on. This day was pretty much overwhelming me, I had no idea what I was doing any longer. And damn, it took me way too long to resynchronize and restore myself again. ...and that is probably the best thing that has happened.

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After a hectic evil evil day, after doing my daily training - particularly the only thing that I was able to do properly. Or at least, half-properly, aha! Continuing my abruptly cut off sentence, I've thought I'd take a bath to refresh myself. See, one of the simplest ways to resynchronized is already that. But.

I noticed it was raining. It's summer and it's raining. Well GEEZ! It isn't that new, it has been raining since several weeks ago but to me... Those weeks ago seemed like months ago. I really didn't notice the rain, if it ever rained the past few days. So today, it really rained for me. Aha!

I really like the rain, as opposed to others who don't. It's simple, really. I like the solitude and the sense of self-refinement through the dripping rain. That probably didn't make any sense though. But yeah, I like it. As much as it is fun for the sun to shine bright daily, a rainy day... is something also fun for me. Aha, but I ha~te it if I have to go out during rainy days though! Yeah yeah, I like rain.

...I like it so much that. On a whimsical decision I. Ahahaha, it's so embarrassing. Or maybe it sounds so awful that you'd pity me? Or like a lonesome wolf. Something so~mething

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Grabbing my towel upstairs, I went down, unlocked the door and- *drip drip drip*, the sound of rain, not anymore hindered by walls or windows or whatnots. Yeah. Like a little kid, unwary of what the rain can cause, so curious yet innocent. I went out, with my shirt on, with no such thing like umbrellas or jackets. And enjoyed the drops of rain on my head, on my shirt.

Ahah, I even had some wild moments like jumping and running around lol, but I don't want to wake up everyone so I kept it easy, aha. Mostly I just tried to sit somewhere there, and imagining I'm an l4d witch waiting for a prey lol, or I'm in an emo scene or something, but lol nah doesn't suit me. I wasn't even THAT sad, and even when I was trying to think of things? Damn, nothing is coming out of my mind! ...though in all seriousness, even though I wasn't really sad. I was really thinking deeply about something.

Yeah yeah, talk about such a random decision. But. The cold drops of rain, covering my entire body made me realize. It made me found... inner peace? Something like that, aha. Sure, it was an exaggerated form of synchronization but... I told you, I like rain! And yeah, I was able to cool off my mind.

About that lingering thought of my important decision in the near future. I'm still unsure.
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My craving for that one and only thing I desire. Nah, it's actually two, according to some part of me right now but. After watching several league replays, I WANT TO PLAY DotA NOW! ;__;
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I will move forward again. Not just life, but also Clannad. I've finished Misae route, and partly, it really affected me. After all, that route was kind of an inspiration to my last real 'route'. So I said, "...fuck.", aha
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Superficiality. A new word I learned and... as I reflect on why I hate superficial people, I guess. Turning the chessboard over, I look like one too. At least, for those who doesn't know the other me, so I shouldn't be conceited and cynical about it. Aha :)

Uh huh. Yeah, basically that is what this post is about. It's fun playing around in the rain! Though I want to write more and more, it'll der~ail too much. I'll probably starting going out under the rain every night I get to have, ahah :))

Oh and by the way, of course I took a bath after bathing in the rain so I'll be fine... I hope? Ahaha :P So I say. To the Seven Sisters of Deadly Sins, sorry but toda~y is the only day you'll get me all at the same time. To myself, no other: Push on and forward! And to you guys - let's have fun under the rain some other time :))

Sidenote: Plain plain post. Aha :< As much as I hate long blocks of text, I guess in a way it has its own unique demeanor or style. lolwat